Politics made simple

                        POLITICS MADE SIMPLE
                        ====================

        Do you have trouble understanding politics?  If so, the following
primer (thanks to the Manitoban - University of Manitoba) should clear it
up for you. No bull.

        Socialism -    You have two cows. Give one to your neighbour.

        Communism -    You have two cows. Give both to the government.
                       The government gives you milk.

        Capitalism -   You sell one cow and buy a bull.

        Facism -       You have two cows. Give milk to the government.
                       The government sells it.

        Nazism -       The government shoots you and takes the cows.

        New Dealism -  The government shoots one cow, milks the other,
                       and pours the milk down the sink.

        Anarchism -    Keep the cows. Steal another one.
                       Shoot the government.

        Conservatism - Freeze the milk. Embalm the cows.

        Liberalism -   Give away one cow.  Get the government to
                       give you a new cow.  Now give them both away.